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6 months in " The Desert "

It's been 6 months in the Desert for my hubby and finally it comes to an end with nice closure.
End of last year, hubby had an opportunity to move to new company and after we prayed and discerned together we decided to take this new opportunity.
At first, hubby was reluctant because in his current job, he was doing okay  but by moving to new job, he was not sure if he could make it.

With prayer and courage, we decided to embark on that journey.
I had affirmation from God that this journey was not easy in the beginning, it's like Israel who crossed the red sea to go to promised land. There will be desert in between the journey.

One month later after he joined the new company, he got new sales order unfortunately it's not smooth sailing. There's a problem for this first sales order that he needed to sacrifice our holiday time. Well, he was present with us but his mind was in this job and the problem.
After the problem solved, two weeks later he heard the news that his direct manager will leave this company. It was shocking news for him since this division was only three of them and with the departure of his manager, it only left him and another colleague.

Not long after that, he was blown with another news that his colleague will be leaving soon and both the manager and his colleague will officially leave on March.

His moral was extremely down, his anxiety and negative thinkings started streaming in. He was so sure that his division will be closed down and after his probation ended by end of April, he will be asked to leave.
When he told me about this, instead of worrying, I prayed again to God through rosary prayer. I asked God whether we have made the right decision to embark on this journey or not and I have an affirmation that it's God's willing.

I was empowered by Holy Spirit to have faith and trust in Him completely and not to be worry. He has put hubby in this current job for a purpose for something bigger in the end.
He won't let us down and He will provide whatever my hubby needs.
With this affirmation, I was no longer worry and did my usual daily tasks.

On the other hand, my hubby was so anxious that I felt we were drifting apart.
He seldom smile and looked haggard every day.

One fine day, I asked him why you looked so different from the way he used to be.
At first, he didn't want to talk about it because he thought that I may not understand but after some pursuants, finally he opened up and talked about his feeling.
He was so angry with God and me because it looked like  I instigated him to move to this new company and in the end it lead no where. He wished that if he could turn back the time, he stayed in the previous company. He thought that we made wrong choice.

As a wife, I wanted to encourage him, I told him being alone in this division was not really a bad thing because you can do whatever you want as if this's your own business.
With his nature character to follow and support the leader, he thought that I expected too much for him. Instead of calming him down, we were in cold wars.
He thought that I have changed, I didn't love and accept his weakness etc.

I was like " Whatttt ??"
Then I just kept my mouth shut and didn't want to talk about it anymore.
I just offered him in pray. I asked God to grant him with strength, courage, wisdom and positive minds.
Then, I just do day to day tasks and sometimes I raise voice to the kids especially during morning rush when the time is so limited and the kids are not ready to school.
And again in the morning after we dropped of the kids to school, he will start to blame me for raising the voice to kids, I have changed, didn't understand and accommodate him and sometimes he will repeat the past topic like his regret to move to this new company.
I was like "Whattt ??" I didn't change, I did what I used to do, I raise voice to the kids since 9 years ago when our first born was here.
In the past three months, our marriage life was in the rock.

On February, he started to look for new job, he applied jobs that available in linked in but inside my heart I knew that it won't be successful because it's not what God wants.
On February 14th, before we went back to Indonesia for Chinese New Year, I told him that it's no point for you to look for other jobs, God wants you to stay here.
I asked him to focus on this current job and did his best.

Unfortunately, he couldn't accept it and again we were in the heated argument.
He told me that next month both his colleagues will be gone and by end of April, it was the end of his probation period, if he's not starting to look for the job, what happened if he's retrenched ?
I told him I trusted God completely,  I have seen His past works on my own family that He never let His children starved. He will provide.

He said to me, ok let see what happened end of April, whether you are right or he's right.

I was so tired encouraging and fighting with him, I told him that I washed my hand for your problem. If you want to leave, looking for new job or staying in this company, it's up to you.
But he told me that there's no point to be husband and wife if he needs to decide everything by himself without my support.
In the end, I just keep quiet and I told myself, no point talking about this to him since he didn't want to listen and understand, I chose to offer him in prayer to God instead.

Every day I pray for him in his current job that he could be the blessing for people surrounding him in this company.
I ask God to provide whatever he needs to complete his mission.

By the end of March, everything started to change. He got the opportunity to use his skills and experiences in bidding a project that's really important for the company.
In short, on Maundy Thursday, he and his team were able to secure this project and on Easter Sunday, he got affirmation that he may be confirmed as permanent staff in this company.

Early May, he needed to go to Korea to meet the supplier for this project and during his trip, he got an  order from Thailand that the items were not his scope so he passed it to his new colleague who needed the order and he got another order - quite a big sum from the customer who seldom placed order before.

Long short story, in the past one month, God has revealed Himself to him how His hand did miraculous works and how he can be the blessing for his colleagues.

On Ascension Day, he finally received the confirmation letter to be permanent staff in this company.
He was so relieved and overjoyed.

As for me, during this journey it really increased my faith.
1 John 5 : 4 
" For whatever is born of God overcometh the world : and this is the victory that overcomes the world even our faith "

As for him, hopefully it also increases his faith and change his mindset from the follower to be the leader.

Well, we thank God for this past 6 months journey, there's no right or wrong in the end.
What important is our marriage becomes stronger, our faith has increased.

Thank you so much Lord for Your blessings. Your providence and Your promises.
Without You, we never be able to embark on this journey.
We will trust You and put our hope and faith in You.
Mother Mary, thank you so much for praying with and for us.
Without your intercession, we would never have this courage to put our trust in God.



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