Skip to main content

Love gives freedom

This past week I felt lost and numb. I didn't feel any peace or joy in my heart, instead I hate myself.

All the negative thoughts were coming to my mind, jealousy, hopeless, you name it.

I know I have a trust issues based on my wild imagination.

I feel bad to my hubby, he's so nice, patience and kind to me. Instead of gratitude, I push him to the corner and have a  suspicious thought that he's having affair.

In fact, I disgusted myself.

Not only that, I also felt lost in my works. It seems that I have no more control and have no idea what surprise will come tomorrow.

Today is the eve of all saints' day  and I went to the church alone. I was in tear when we prayed litany of the saints.

Two things I learnt from the saints are detachment, embrace the journey and faithful to God.

I know that I couldn't run away from this process because this process is changing and moulding my heart to be humble, more loving and patience to the process and others.

One love character that I need to practice is Love gives freedom to other people to be who they are.



Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Jubilee Year - Year of Hope (2025)

Year of Hope: A Personal Reflection on 2025 The year 2025 has been declared a Jubilee Year, a  Year of Hope  by the Pope—a time for peace, joy, and prosperity. For many, entering a new year brings feelings of happiness and optimism. However, I find myself on a different path, starting the year with anxiety and uncertainty rather than joy and hope. For me, 2025 is a year of the unknown. It marks the first time in four years that I will not hold the title of a working mom. Transitioning from this identity feels daunting and unfamiliar. It is also the year I plan to embark on a new venture: starting a winter rental business. This endeavor excites me but is fraught with challenges. There are countless pieces of the puzzle yet to be solved, and I pray for wisdom and the support of "ordinary angels" to guide me through. This is also a pivotal year for our family. Two of our children will face major exams. While I know the journey matters more than the results, I hope they develop s...
Post a Comment
Read more

Prayer for broken marriage

Lord, Your word promises that you’re near to the brokenhearted.  I am broken.  My heart hurts from all the hard parts  of this marriage.  You promise to save those who are crushed in spirit.  My spirit hurts from the deep cuts.  Save this marriage, heal my heart, restore the hope and joy in our marriage.  No, make it more full than it ever was, to begin with.  In Jesus’ name. (Psalm 34: 18) Heavenly Father, you said I could cast my burdens upon You and You will sustain me.  This hard season of marriage has lasted longer and been more painful than I ever could have imagined and I am failing.  Please take this burden and help me to not be shaken from the commitment to our marriage.  (Psalm 55:22) Holy Spirit, I am weak, hurting, and ready to give up on this whole mess of a marriage.  You said,  “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness”, but I am struggling to believe there is hope.  Take this ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Dreams come true - Cappadocia (day 7)

This is the highlight of Cappadocia which is hot air balloon ride. As it depends a lot on the weather, we were lucky that we could fly to watch sunrise. We were picked up around 5.30am in the morning to Urgup area and arrived 20 mins later. They provided us with light breakfast while they lit up the balloon.  We started riding it around 6.20am and it's so breathtaking to see the Goreme area and hundreds of balloon joining us. The sunrise is around 7am and by 7.30am we already landed safely.  We had champagne celebration and received certificate too and returned back to our hotel for breakfast. Around 10am, we were picked up for Green Valley tour. Stopped by at Goreme Panorama and Pigeon valley for photo spots. After that, we went to Underground city where Anatolian people lived underground to survive from natural disaster and dangers. It's amazing how they build the houses and lived there for a long period of time. Then, we continued our tour to Selime Monastery and Cathedral ...
Post a Comment
Read more