Today marks 16 years since our official courting date. For some, the day "jadian" may not mean anything after they got married, however it always be in my mind and heart forever the day we officially became boyfriend - girlfriend.
When I did spring cleaning in my storeroom, I read through some diaries I wrote and saw this. It looks cute when I read back about the dream of my life partner. I wished to have Angmoh hahaha and ended up with my hubby now. Even though physically is like 180 deg different, but his characters matched with what I wanted.
This morning after exercise, I passed by the fruit store and saw very good deals fruits and they are sweet so I bought his favourite fruits - mangosteens, jambu, guava, mango.
And when I came back home and browsed for music in spotify, there's podcast - Lovetalk by Tim and Chels, they talked about Tujuan pacaran (The purpose of courtship).
It's like a flashback what we have done before and to affirm that we were on the right track from the beginning.
So here's the summary in Bahasa Indonesia
Tujuan pacaran : Untuk evaluasi - Can I build my life with this person ?
Yg perlu di evaluasi : 2C (Character and Chemistry)
Pertanyaan untuk Characters :
1. Apakah karakternya sesuai dengan value kita ?
2. Bagaimana mereka memperlakukan orang laen baik yg lebih muda atau lebih tua ?
3. Apakah dia mendorong kamu untuk menjadi yang lebih baik ?
Pertanyaan untuk Chemistry :
1. Apakah kamu suka menghabiskan waktu bersama dia ? suka ngobrol tanpa harus mikirin mau topik apa ?
2. Tujuan hidupnya kemana ? Apakah general goals cocok ?
Ada karakter tapi tak ada chemistry - jadi hambar
Ada chemistry tapi karakter kurang - fondasi tidak kuat, jadi ketika ada badai, akan gampang hancur
Tujuan pacar yang salah : hanya sebagai status, untuk melengkapi satu sama laen (ketika kita ga happy dengan diri sendiri ato mengalami kekosongan, kita ga bisa mengharapkan dari orang laen untuk mengisi hidup dan membahagiakan kita).
Consumer mentality vs companion mentality.
Consumer mentality - kita punya list cowo yang seperti apa aja yang kita mau seperti barang yang bisa di personalised dan di customised.
Companion mentality - kita mencari cowo yg bisa kita cintai as a whole baik kekurangan maupun kelebihan sebagai satu paket
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